"You have got to be honostly kidding me with this bullshit", screamed family friend Pete Fackles of Smiths County.
"We've closed two schools as a result of having to pay these two felons, because they took wierd arrest pictures! The County Hospital was forced to pull the plug on twelve sick people in order to cover the costs for these mugshot winner payouts", said Fackles. "It's unconcionable."
Taxpayers protested at City Hall on Friday as the convoy of coffins from the hospital proceded down the street while family members collapsed to their knees wailing in agony.
"They unplugged my sister!" screamed one protester.
Unfortunately for the furious demonstrators on hand, City Hall members were absent as they were presenting the one million dollars in cash prizes to the two mug shot champions at Prestona Country Club during the protests. The country club event included golf and a black tie celebration with awards ceremony.
One protester set himself on fire after learning the mayor was having a golf party with the felon winners instead of repealing the prize money. Fire rescue was unable to respond to the self-immolation, as they were also golfing and attending the following black tie event.
Jonah Leshnay - the Peel
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